Athlete's Yoga

Last night I went to "athlete's yoga". My thought was that this class was designed with the muscles-too-tight, inflexible, perhaps-not-graceful athlete in mind. (Hmmm, ME.) I envisioned stretching. And peaceful music. The class was also only 1 hour. My life fits around this. Most yoga classes are 1.5 - 2 hours. In my mind that is perfect for a long run. Much too long for stretching and ohmmmmming.

I quickly realized this was not going to be stretchy feel-good class when our drill instructor started by saying child's pose did not exist in this class. "If you are tired you go back to push-up position." Awesome!

I have never held the plank position 1 inch of the ground for as long as I did last night. As soon as I would find reprieve from downward dog our drill sergeant had us switch to plank, then every five seconds we lowered ourselves closer to the floor - NEVER touching the floor mind you - in a tricep-aching-I-may-not-be-able-to-swim-next-week pose. I may have cried for my mommy at one point.

Just when I thought we might get relief from this pose, instructions to lift one leg and put our knee on our elbow were given. Serious. I of course could not reach my knee to my elbow so was left somewhat of a folded pretzel mess on my yoga mat. With shaking arms.

In case you are unsure of what this pose looks like (as I was until yoga master hopped right into it to demonstrate), I drew a sketch for you. It was a bad hair day. And my face is blue on purpose.

It is probably a good thing the off-season only takes place once a year.